When you’re strange

weird people

A friend of mine sent me this quote the other day. It did not offend me for two reasons:

  1. I know she’s weird
  2. I’ve accepted the fact of my being weird long ago.

But acceptance of the so-called “strange factor” was not always the case.

Of course as a young child, those early years are innocent enough. Playing, singing, dancing with friends. Picking each others noses. Harmless follies.

Soon enough the self-awareness and self-confidence issues began. Not only had I discovered the display of a “quirk” to be shamefully rejected, it also appeared the verified weirdos were not doing so well socially. Being different doesn’t sit well when dealing with the masses. As a person who preferred to feel accepted, I fell into a great cover up of fear and taking myself too seriously.

As the years passed, I became cemented in a downward spiral of the loss “me”. While addictively chasing forms of outside happiness and acceptance, the pattern was established of running from myself. But as a lot of us know, wherever you go – there you are.

By some kind of Grace, in my early thirties I began peeling back layers of falsehood of which I’d been encapsulated. Once again (as in early childhood) I began to find, experience and accept my true self. It has been (and still is) a slow, sometimes painful, yet always Glorious process.  All those strange things I erroneously concluded were unacceptable are becoming acceptable – to me. Turns out that’s all that really matters, loving the person God made me to be.

Bonus: As I accept my true Self, God continuously put others like me in my path. When we unite and let down our weirdo hair, we rejoice in the clarity of who we really are; strange, odd and absolutely amazing!

You are never alone, there are others like you. Take the time to find “your peeps” and celebrate the peculiar wonderfulness that is you.

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Attitude Adjustment

My 6-year-old granddaughter and I have an open dialogue about random life stuff and things we don’t understand.

Once in a while I will even share one of my daily readings with her if I think she will “get it” (BTW she gets it better than I do).

Yesterday she grabbed one of my books, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff… and it’s all small stuff” by Richard Carlson.

“Oh grandma, I like this one,” she says as she brings the opened book my way.

Think of what you have instead of what you want

 

“Yes this sure is a good one.” (and just what I needed I might add)

I’ve been really caught up in negativity and nonacceptance. There’s a lot of fearful thoughts going on about just about everything and once I get on a roll  -watch out-  Avalanche!!!!!

Today I’m going right into the solution as my granddaughter has CLEARLY led me to, starting with a plain ol’ gratitude list.

Thank you my wise, beautiful granddaughter. As usual, just when I think I’m teaching them…….

What do you do to help get yourself out of the quicksand of negativity? Do Tell 🙂

 

thank you

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Magnificent Moon

moon and wolf

 Evening arrives bringing along its eminent darkness.

 Stepping onto the porch, I smile as the fireflies dance to the cricket’s tune.

 The cobalt glow transmitting through the light-less street could only mean one thing.

Suspense fills me as I play peek-a-boo with the tall trees, searching for a clearing.

Creation is undeniable in the presence of the magnificent full moon.

Image courtesy of nixxphotography / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Say Whaaaa???

son and dad baseball

One fine spring day, my husband and young son were watching a baseball game together  when I overheard the following conversation.

Husband: If you keep practicing baseball you could play with the pros one day.

Son: Really? Wow! How much money do they make?

Husband: Hundreds of thousands. Enough to buy you dear old dad a new truck!

Son: Well dad…um…I don’t know. By then you may be…….you know…..passover.

 

You just can’t make this stuff up…..:-P

 

 

Image courtesy of digitalart / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

 

Mom a.k.a. God

pray dont worry

I have this boldly glued on my wall in my meditation area. Pretty much everyday I sit, meditate, open my eyes and see the words, pray about everything, worry about nothing. 

Yet I still worry.

Mostly about my children. What will become of them. How they are really doing. Are they happy? Do they know how awesome they truly are? Is there something more I could be doing to “help” them?

Therein lies the rub.

I know as parents we have our duties. Our responsibility’s to these beings we’ve helped bring into the world. I get that.

But where do we stop and God begin?

So often I take on the role of trying to be their everything. Of thinking I AM their everything. When I do this I am Easing God Out (ego) and I hardly even notice I’m doing it. I mean I’m their mother, I’m supposed to be getting “in there” and “helping” and “teaching” them. Right?

And the answer is, sure. But to a degree. For me, I have to ask myself in this dance of life, am I leading or am I letting my partner lead? I must be letting Him lead, if I’m praying, meditating and asking for help. But am I really letting go and letting God?

All I have to do is reflect honestly on the past week of which I can say….eh hem….. “no”. I haven’t been letting go and letting God. I’ve been getting in there with my suggestions and ideas to “help” them. But, when I’m doing this for the most part, I’m trying to get them to see things my way – secretly believing (knowing) my way is the best way.

I am the MOM after all. I do (should) know and want only what’s best for them. Right?

Back to the honest inventory of myself…….

I have an agenda whether I like it or not (and every time I see it I’m still very surprised at myself). When I really look at my actions and thoughts I clearly see, I’ve not only been leading the dance, I’ve been stepping on a lot of toes.

Even with my mediation, prayer and “talk” about God, I’ve subtly got in there and have been trying to run the whole show. So it’s no wonder I’m worried! If I’m really in charge, we’re all in trouble!

So what’s a mom to do? Surely I have to do something?!!???!!???!?

And as with any dance, all I really need to do is just master a few basic moves, trust my partner, relax and glide gracefully to the music.

God loves his children as much as I do (with the real possibility he loves them even more!) There is really nothing to worry about. Ever.

Maybe all my children really “need”, is for me to remember that.

Kids are literally hilarious

oh no

Have you ever found yourself taking life a little too seriously? We can all get caught up in trying to be the perfect “Fantasy Family”. Leave it to our children to bring us back to reality.

Take my family for instance. Inadvertently, we started an annoying practice of yelling throughout the house as a form of communicating to each other.

Finally, I had enough of the loudness and declared, “No more yelling. From now on when we need to talk to each other, we will use our inside voices.”

At the time, my youngest was five years old and he quickly forgot the new rule as he shouted from another room, “Mmmooommm, mmmooommm, mmmoooommm!”

Determined to make this work, I did not respond. It didn’t take him long to catch on and come over to see me.

Feeling proud of myself, I softly told him, “You know you are wasting your breath when you yell like that.”

Oh no, mommy!” he panicked. “How many do I have left?”

 

photo from bing images

Hush your heart

drew sleeping

Although I have a tendency to be a big thinker, today I’m being guided in my reading to hush.

But I have to..…..and you don’t understand I…….this has to be figured out now……..

Hush

Like we sing with love to those beautiful bundles of joy, swaddling them in blankets soft as cotton balls….hush little baby don’t say a word.

So it will be with me today. And it’s funny because it’s the day before Thanksgiving and I have lots to do……

Hush

I have nothing to worry about, nothing to fear, nothing to figure out or improve on. My job today is to, quietly as I can, go about my day trusting in The Plan and remembering my lesson for today the hush of heaven holds my heart today.

I wish the same for you today as well.

Regrets, I’ve had a few

It’s hard to live a life without having regrets. Why?  Because we are human. But also because somewhere in us we believe that we should have all the answers at all times and should execute all of these things…….perfectly.

Rather pompous of us don’t ya think?

I especially get caught up in this when it comes to parenting. I mean we are molding a life for God’s sake! This is HUGE!!!!!!

And while yes it is……there is so much more going on than our parenting.

I was getting caught up in it myself today and then I am reminded with one of my readings;

Your Son is still as you created him…..and what can alter Holiness Itself?”

I know this to be true in my own personal life. I grew up in less than “perfect” conditions, followed suit, and lived a “troubled” life for many, many years.

Today I have proof that underneath it all is a perfect soul intact.

So while we have been conditioned, very thoroughly I might add, on what a person’s path is “supposed” to look like, there is no such thing.

While I still don’t like a lot of things, I see how much of that is my ego in play because today I have a deeper belief that at all times-in every situation-we are all doing the best we can with what we have.

So maybe regrets are reminders I need to forgive myself and others because there is nothing we could have done to another or that another could have done to us for that matter, that can change the fact that we are still as God created us underneath it all.

And that is Perfection.